Person Who Is Usually Reasonable:
Hey, Sara, you know about lots of stuff. Can I ask you something?.
Sara:
Of course. What's up?
PWIUR:
Well, like... I was just wondering if you could give me some information on, you know....
Sara:
On?
PWIUR:
On, like, you know, training to become a vampire.
Sara:
...
PWIUR:
And you can learn the, you know, skills. To become one. I know they exist, don't they?
Sara:
... No.
PWIUR:
But, but... There are vampire lesbian cults on the Internet!
Sara:
I'm sure there are, but those people are just dressing up and pretending. It's fantasy, like in D&D roleplaying or zombie parades. It's just for fun.
PWIUR:
I dunno, I think you can get vampire training.
Sara:
You believe that humans can train to live for thousands of years and subsist off of blood sucked from the jugulars of the living?
PWIUR:
Yes! I saw it somewhere.
Sara:
On the Internet.
PWIUR:
Yeah, but also somewhere else.
Sara:
Where?
PWIUR:
On that episode of The L Word.
Sara:
... That's a TV show.
PWIUR:
Yeah, but a lot of the stuff on that show is like real life!
Sara:
But not lesbian vampires.
PWIUR:
Yeah, but I think I know one.
Sara:
Who?
PWIUR:
My ex-girlfriend. One time she, like, bit my neck... really hard.
Sara:
See this French fry? (Holds up French fry) I can bite this French fry really hard, but that does not make me a vampire.
PWIUR:
ARE you a vampire?
Sara:
No!
PWIUR:
I think you're wrong. I think I can become a vampire.
Sara:
You're welcome to practice on these French fries.
